


Tastes Like Heartbreak

by Fraudgara



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Buzzfeed: Worth It (Web Series), Watcher Entertainment
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Breakups, Compersion, Double Anal Penetration, Established Relationship, Ex Sex, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Size Queen Bergara, Threesome - M/M/M, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:33:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21838282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fraudgara/pseuds/Fraudgara
Summary: It’s just weird. Shane leans over his shoulder to make a remark, something about Steven selling all of his New York furniture, telling him to hurry back and be an L.A. boy again. Ryan only hears a hum in his ears because Shane’s chin is on his shoulder and it must look comfortable, easy and kinda couple-y, and Steven sees it, and--and--Ryan should have just told him.
Relationships: Implied Standrew - Relationship, Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej, Ryan Bergara/Steven Lim, Ryan Bergara/Steven Lim/Shane Madej
Comments: 38
Kudos: 191





	Tastes Like Heartbreak

**Author's Note:**

> Y'all better read those tags or abandon hope all ye and happy holidays!
> 
> Thanks to Meph for a great beta-read and some marvelous ideas.
> 
> Disclaimer: If your or someone you know personally's name appeared in any of those tags, this is not for you to read.

When Ryan first says the words, “Watcher Entertainment” aloud to Steven, he grins at Ryan over their FaceTime call and Ryan knows he should have told him.

It’s just weird. Shane leans over his shoulder to make a remark, something about Steven selling all of his New York furniture, telling him to hurry back and be an L.A. boy again. Ryan only hears a hum in his ears because Shane’s chin is on his shoulder and it must look comfortable, easy and kinda couple-y, and Steven _sees_ it, and--and--

Ryan should have just told him.

“Nothing quite like asking your ex to come work with you and your current--whatever the hell you are.” He makes a point to say it a little loud so Shane can smile, mine a look at him, reading between lines and staring an exasperated look at the ceiling because Ryan doesn't say the word “boyfriend”.

“Maybe you just gotta ease up on sleeping with your coworkers,” Shane says impishly.

Ryan’s styrofoam cup hits the wall by Shane’s arm; the last dregs of coffee skid across the rug.

They both ignore it. It’s officially their last few weeks at Buzzfeed and something about it feels gratifying. Shane grins at him, looking back down at his phone, the tips of his hair crowning over the rims of his glasses. Strange thinking that--the look of him, all limbs, caustic remarks, and startling smiles--was Ryan’s, but _boyfriend_?

It’s not like _that_. The word _boyfriend_ just feels wrong. Shane and him have been to hell and back, He knows Ryan and Ryan knows him; they shifted from orbiting each other like asteroids on a collision course to full on colliding and Shane had once told him, heat of the moment. “Oh you’re it for me, Bergara.”

And Ryan had fallen hard for that. Hard like he’d taken a bad beating.

It was different with Steven though.

One night while he kettle-cooked a pot of popcorn, he’d told Shane all about it.

"We never really broke up. We were never really a thing though…"

How they used to be--young and thrilled about the opportunity of a real video production company, bonding over too many shared interests too quickly and after-game showers had turned into awkward-no-eye-contact-fumbling behind closed doors with the lights off, and Steven, wine drunk one night, had told him he wasn’t into guys. Ryan had said, “Same,” with a dumb vehemence like his skin didn’t spark alive every time he looked at Steven’s fingers too long, thought too hopefully about what they could do if he’d let him.

Much like a lot of a regular people’s go-to emotional reactions, Shane just didn’t do jealousy apparently. Instead he leaned his head on his arms over Ryan’s kitchen island, eyes sharp with attention when he said, “Was the sex worth the after-school special drama?”

Ryan would laugh and tell him _Yes_ , watching as the curiosity lit up Shane’s stare, imagining a whole taste-bed of things, images Ryan could only create with words to tell him that he used to forget himself as the mattress would breathe under him and Steven. How it felt not sucking in enough air because Steven wasn’t polite in bed; he fucked a steam-battle rhythm, pulling him out, and hissing out half-words, sticky and blistering against the side of his throat, “Rock with me, Ryan-- god, that’s it.” His hips would snap in like he meant to break Ryan, enveloping his insides with a stretching pulse and Ryan would make shock-hungry mewls that sounded like someone else; someone that could have loved Steven a little too much.

He never got to meet that someone else because Steven had started traveling for work. And it was only about work; about the seriousness of his craft. He wasn’t making fodder or viral content; he was making something _real_. And it was somehow always something _real_ when Steven brought up Andrew Ilnyckyj.

Then there was some elaborate, mysterious and emotional mess with Andrew that Steven _never_ wanted to talk about but he kept showing up at Ryan’s looking tear-streaked and miserable with a new overpriced bottle of something that tasted like creamsicles. Ryan thought he should ask, thought it was weird how it made him feel so locked out to see Steven in pain, but all Steven wanted to do was drink and eventually ply Ryan with creamsicle-flavoured kisses. Heartbreak probably tasted sickly sweet like that but Ryan didn’t want to think. Instead he was too focused on the sharp edge of pleasure that came from rubbing his own dick through the sodden cotton of his briefs and the friction of Steven’s cock sliding over his lips and tongue, making him all messy and teasing at the back of his throat. Steven would make helpless little sounds and tug faintly on Ryan’s hair, petting desperately and mumbling incoherent filth at him.

Maybe heartbreak tasted like watching someone who never really belonged to you moving to New York.

“When are you gonna tell him how it is with us then?” Shane says quietly one Sunday after Ryan had woken him up under blankets, mouth closed over Shane’s dick, ready and waiting.

Ryan couldn’t reply, mostly because his mouth was busy. His fingers were hot and sweaty from being under a cave of cotton and wool. He would always think of this particular morning when he thought of Shane because his bringing up Steven, then the sensory memory and pure sensation blended somewhere between his brain and his hands; and Shane’s low breathy sounds when he played with him made him hot. He rolled the softness of his balls between his fingers, taking one in his mouth and sucking on it gently. Shane jerked under him, and Ryan held him down, not wanting to catch his teeth on anything too important.

Besides he’s come to realise he likes doing this too much for Shane to go and get in the way. He especially loves leaving marks everywhere, like possession and ownership and probably one step up from writing ‘this is mine’ on Shane, and Ryan switched to sucking the other one, tasting the faint chemical and oily tang of it in his mouth as he was unable to stop the drool from running down his chin.

How was he supposed to tell Steven he’d gone from “not really into guys” to being kind of obsessed with how big Shane got in his mouth; how big Steven was?

He doesn’t dare ask until Steven sends him the first photo of his return ticket from New York almost a month later. “Fuck, you think it’s gonna be weird?”

“Nah,” Shane mumbles, distracted. He looks up when Ryan doesn’t say anything, and gets a good look at his expression. “You just gotta put it out in the open.”

In the open. It hadn’t been hard for anyone else to tell that Shane and him were getting a lot more intimate since last year, but Steven had been gone for months when it started. And Ryan knows he’d been very specifically leaving it out. Like Steven and him were all secrets before; like he and Shane are a fucking liveshow at the Apollo. Steven _has_ to know about it, and while Ryan figures Steven’s way would be to just politely ignore it while they worked, one of them _had_ to say something sooner or later.

“I just don’t want to tell him too late,” he says to Shane. “I don’t want him to show up thinking he and I can just--”

“And why not?” Shane cuts in affably and Ryan looks at him. “I can be there with you when he does, if you want? Help you explain things?”

How supportive. Shane’s got Ryan's laptop open, looking through a gallery of office desks. Ryan wants three corner desks for their offices, and Shane had just said something that sounds like he imagines Steven will walk in the door and that Shane will stand by for Steven to immediately start undressing Ryan. It’s been a year. It was never real. Ryan stops pacing the room and opens his phone. Steven will be back in L.A. in three days.

“What if that’s the only reason he agreed to this. Maybe I should just call him, get it over with. He can change his mind about the company, about me, you… us?”

“Oh, now be _professional_ , Ryan,” Shane declares, mouth quirked up, though he doesn’t look up from his screen. “We’re _legally_ incorporated. Now _you_ just gotta incorporate _us_.”

Ryan frowns at the choice of words. “It’s more complicated than that. You know he’d never actually fight you; he’s not--”

Shane’s eyes squint with his next smile and he finally does look up at Ryan. “You think we’re gonna cross swords for you, Little guy?”

Ryan promptly wants to murder Shane, which would solve one problem while creating a slew of others, but he mainly wants to make a flow chart; an interconnected web of things he can do to show and tell Steven that things might have changed, that he still cares about him, that he always kinda did, that maybe it’s a lack of closure that makes him wonder if Steven’s had anyone else since. If he’s over the Andrew thing; if he’s over Ryan.

“Text from Steven,” Ryan reports to the air around Shane in the car. “He’s already landed! What the fuck, he says we can meet him at Embassy Suites.”

“Baller,” Shane remarks delicately.

Ryan had had it figured out before this. The plan had been to pick Steven up from the airport and then get up and leave Shane and Steven alone when they stopped at a bar for their promised celebration of their official certificate of incorporation; Ryan was gonna say “First round on me,” then when he brought back the drinks, the plan was to lay a big fat one on Shane. It was supposed to be casual.

But Steven had clearly changed his flight time, had checked into his hotel and now they were gonna be crammed together in a suite. Maybe they’d go to the bar after?

“I should’ve just sent a company-wide memo,” Ryan announces because if he doesn’t say it; he’s gonna implode. “It’s just the three of us at this point so--”

“Now _that_ woulda been funny,” Shane interjects, launching almost immediately into what is supposed to be his ‘Unsolved Ryan’ voice. “I, Ryan Steven Bergara, would like to inform all CEOs of a recent update to our company’s fraternization policy especially in regards to my dick--ow! I’m _driving_ , Ryan!”

“I got them from Ladurée,” Steven told them, holding up a pastel box of some packaged French dessert. “I almost opened them on the plane, so feel honoured because I’m _starving_.”

“Neat,” Shane’s arm reaches past Ryan to take the box from Steven. “Macaroons.”

“ _Macarons_ ,” Steven corrects, shaking off his bomber jacket with his hands now free.

Ryan feels like it’s gonna come up any second now. Steven had watched the two of them come in the room all smiles and excitement about the secrecy of it. No social media. Just them in a hotel room, about to talk about a real company with real goals and Shane and him were sleeping together and Ryan didn’t know what Steven would say.

Ryan just keeps picturing the look on Steven’s face at his door at too many 3 A.Ms. The way his deep brown eyes cast at Ryan, dead tired and red; the curve of his mouth pressed firm in a hurt that didn’t have words. It’s what wanting something that didn’t belong to you looked like. Pinched and drunk.

Ryan knows that’s why he’s putting it off. It’s just that Shane is being so cool about it, and Shane is his and he wants Shane, but Steven…

“I can get us drinks--what are we doing?--like--I can go get--”

Shane and Steven both look at him, duo silhouettes in front of the wide hotel window of Steven’s room. They’re both willowy in their own separate ways; both familiar to him, topography worn into the tips of his fingers and the dip of his palms.

"I've got beers for you two. I know you'd both roast me if I only brought a bottle of rosé," Steven supplies, looking at Ryan like he's growing horns.

It works out. Ryan gets to pull up the six pack from the mini fridge. It's just pre-gaming now, and they're all stupid sober for the mean time. Steven sits down with the open box of macarons on the table beside him as Shane plops himself down opposite him on the bed, popping one whole in his mouth to Steven's dismay while waving his hands at Ryan like a majestic lord. He's about to do a bit, mouth full of pink french cookie. Steven is already smiling and Ryan has to do it now.

It's clumsy of course and Shane still has a macaron in his mouth but he tastes like confetti icing when he murmurs Ryan's name. He thinks that should be it. Just a kiss but then Shane's hands are on his shirt; he's opening his mouth under Ryan all a mess of crumbs and a sharp happy laugh. Ryan drops the cans because he's being pulled right into Shane's arms. He feels the play of fingers up his shirt before he can stop it and his shiver as Shane rolls him into the bed and all but straddles him is evident because it vibes through the both of them.

"Sorry I thought you were attacking me," Shane says simply like that's an actual explanation.

"You can _not_ be serious right now," Ryan gasps out and his eyes dart toward Steven.

Steven hasn't moved; doesn't change expression as he leans on the armrest of his chair, biting into a macaron languidly. “What are you guys doing?” he asks quietly, dusting stray crumbs back onto his plate.

Ryan refuses to be embarrassed though he really is. He goes to push Shane off of him but then Shane slips sideways so he’s using Ryan as more of a pillow than anything.

“Celebrating,” Shane murmurs, walking long fingers and blunt fingernails over Ryan’s kneecap. He does it deliberately, scraping the hems of Ryan's shorts over ticklish skin. Ryan bites his lips, trying to struggle but Shane is better at using his weight. He tries digging his fingers in Shane’s side, but that just makes Shane twist and bear down between Ryan’s legs. Ryan lets out a strangled yell, curling in which only makes them press harder together.

Shane trembles with laughter, eyes shut and gleaming with tears of mirth. He barely gets the words out and Ryan barely gets his hands up to cover his mouth. “ Steven. Did you know Ryan likes it rough?”

 _Yikes_.

"Shane, what the actual hell?!" Also Ryan hadn’t quite realised he’d been that obvious about it. He’s kind of laughing too because Shane is the most ridiculous human being and Steven is just dead silent, still watching. It’s like his worst nightmare except his entire body is singing

“I’m sure he does,” Steven responds in a soft tone, folding one leg over the other, biting the other half of a pink macaron; he chews slowly, his pink mouth forming a saucy moue of satisfaction. Ryan is mortified.

And hot.

Shane catches Ryan at the buttons near his stomach and chuckles caustically. He turns over on his back, head over Ryan’s spread thighs as Ryan inadvertently gets a fist into Shane’s shirt, accidentally grazing his palm over a soft, long stomach. Shane shuts his eyes, but tips his face toward Steven. “So anyway, we gotta go over the budget _together_ , right?” he asks. "For each individual series, I mean."

“Read my mind exactly,” Steven says with the first sign of surprise today. “That'll be half the work we gotta do out of the way—you ever bite Shane like you used to bite me, Ryan?”

Ryan, now breaking a sweat because he's actually aroused and Shane can _feel_ it, looks up with shock. “ _What_?”

Steven sucks the icing off a particularly creamy macaron. “You heard me,” he replies, licking the corner of his mouth free of sugar.

Ryan glances at Shane, who simply lays there and looks at him from under fanned eyelashes; a bated breath keeping his lips parted. There’s a distinctive feeling that comes with the moment a surprise party leaps on a person and it’s all of this. The room coming to life brighter than it was moments ago, the sharp feeling that every eye in the room wants your reaction, and all the white lies sitting between you and the people who kept it secret.

“Shane was whispering sweet nothings into my phone when he knew I had a long flight.” Steven says, voice pitched for the perfect tone, one that seemed to drip filthy and hot all over the place. The one that actually could make Ryan’s knees a little weak because it sounded like wet and messy fucking and that made no sense but Steven did crazy things to him. That tone had a lot of really great memories attached to it.

Ryan does a really damn good job not getting shrill. “ _Yeah_?”

“He got me pretty hot,” Steven reports, laying the words out delicately like he talks filthy like that all the time, when Ryan knows Steven is brutally private, _so_ personal. His dirtiest words only meant for nights Ryan had stolen years ago. Nights and days. Minutes of hot tingly motion they’d given up together.

“What was it?” He’s gonna be as calm as he can. Doesn’t want them to think for a second that they’ve rattled him. Because Shane’s breath carries the faintest hint of sugar now and Ryan wants to kiss every sweet spot out of him. “What did Shane say to you?”

Steven opens one of his damn macarons like it’s an oreo and curves his tongue up the inside, pulling icing into his mouth. Such a messy eater. “He was telling me all about how much he likes to be fucked. How he loves it when you fuck him without enough prep, the stretch and burn.”

Ryan’s mouth falls open. He looks up at Shane and Shane can’t hold it in, he bursts out laughing again and for a wild moment, Ryan is convinced he’s gonna have to murder them both. Watcher Entertainment has one CEO now.

“What ...the fuck, dude?” he demands almost voicelessly. The thought of Steven knowing that, of getting hot over it...

“If you’re going to bite him, bite _hard_ ,” Steven prods, tone as low as it gets. That’s it there, the side of him that Ryan catches glimpses of now and then, the Steven that can smile obliviously and tell people, “ _I derive pleasure from watching others enjoy things_.”

Ryan. Has always been a willing convert of those specifics.

He twists sideways, his calves still imprisoned under the weight of Shane’s heavy head despite his best efforts and bends to kiss along Shane’s naked hip, pushing the waistline of his trousers low, eyeing the grooves and strain of the zipper over the front of Shane’s jeans. Ryan licks first and then closes his lips over a particularly teasing contour, sinking his teeth just on that one cream-coloured sharp angle. Shane’s entire frame tenses and his palm placed lazily over Ryan’s sprawled ankle squeezes.

“Perfect,” Steven says after a brief electric pause.

Ryan marvels at the little teeth marks he’s left and the way Shane’s whole body seems fevered suddenly. Ryan looks around at him, leaning in to lick just over the deep impression his bite left and watches Shane gaze at him, eyes hooded like he’s a bit of a miracle.

“Undress him, Ryan.” Steven continues, gesturing vaguely with a macaron.

Ryan grimaces a little. “I was going to,” he retorts, fingers already unhooking the button on the front of Shane’s jeans.

He goes unheard as Steven gives Shane a nod and Shane looks back at Steven contently. “We could only afford a portable white board to start with.”

"We'll manage. I got some stuff being shipped from New York” he replies, taking a bite . He pauses to look over at Ryan who is straightening up and dragging the legs of Shane’s jeans down over knees. Shane obliges, statuesque form slipping out of his shirt easily as Ryan pulls the jeans over his ankles and heels.

He has to be dreaming. It's so surreal to be in a very present moment with Shane like this, Steven just _watching_ , possibilities unraveling _._ Shane makes a soft growl when Ryan crawls up him, resting on his knees over him, gripping him at the shoulders and leaning up to bite at his lips.

“Didn't want to sell _all_ my furniture,” Steven concludes briskly.

“Sure,” Shane whispers against Ryan’s lips, arching when Ryan deliberately begins to dip himself low enough that his shorts brush the tip of Shane’s cock.

“Isn’t Ryan wearing far too much?” Steven remarks and before Ryan can even respond, Shane’s thrown him back and begins pulling obediently at his shorts, trying to drag them down Ryan’s thighs, single-handedly tearing open buttons to bear him.

“OK OK, you've had your fun," Ryan protests, cheeks burning when Shane reaches to pull his shoe off his foot. Somehow that feels the most intimate. "You really think you’re just gonna be tossing me around, huh?”

Ryan mimes like he's gonna kick Shane in the head when he pulls off his sock. Steven snorts and Shane laughs at him and it feels OK. It feels right.

“ _Both_ of you,” he adds archly, looking at Steven out of the corner of his eye. He spots Steven’s faint smile and how he tilts his head to get a better view of both Shane and him.

Shane gives Ryan a sly look, crescent-eyed. “ _Lucky_ _you_ ,” he says, tracing circles over Ryan’s hips and Ryan laughs, ‘accidentally-on-purpose’ whacking him in the shoulder when he shakes off his other shoe.

There’s silence with only Ryan’s soft, “Ah,” when Shane gets at the stretch of skin below his navel, shoving his t-shirt up to his chest. He traps Ryan with his knees on either side of his hips, hard fingers digging into his ribs. Shane’s fist grips the sheets by Ryan’s head and Ryan loses himself in hard, urgent touches rolling fingers under his scrotum. Ryan rocks upward, spreading his legs to the naked graze of Shane’s hand over his erection.

He hears the sound of Steven biting into a crisp edge of a macaron, and turns to look at him and sees the very hot, searching look Steven has trained on the both of them. He still sits casually, one leg folded over his knee, pastel blue biscuit at his lips. Shane’s mouth sucks along and around his nipples, rough wet tongue darting out teasingly over tips and Ryan trembles, clutching involuntarily at the remnants of his clothes, moaning wilfully, loving how Steven’s eyes narrow with a rather sleepy-looking desire. “You know Shane also told me he wanted to know what it would be like for you to take us both.”

“Jesus.” Ryan groaned, fingers tightening as he ground up against Shane, mind flashing through all the possible ways that could go down. Ryan feels like a presentation; he feels wanted and that feels hotter than anything Steven or Shane could do to him right now.

“You think you could do it?” Shane hisses into his skin. “Take us both?”

Ryan can’t stop trembling. “So, let’s say I do this,” he manages. “Do I get the biggest office?”

“You get the biggest something--”

Shane falls apart right along with him as they crumple against each other in a spate of snorts and giggles.

"Oh _wow_. Well, my bag's on the nightstand, Shane,” Steven says loudly, and it’s clear, the hint he’s giving as he begins to dust off his fingers again.

Shane sobers and pulls back, moving to sit against the headboard and reaches for the bag, unearthing an actual whole ass tube. He beckons to Ryan, opening his arms and Ryan crawls to him, straddling his legs and breathing a little sharply at the slide of his dick against Shane’s. Shane kisses him again, drops open-mouthed, hungry pecks over his lips.

Ryan closes his fist around the both of them, bucking a little so the head of his cock rakes up the hood of Shane’s while Shane’s finger clicks against the cap. He flicks the cap off and pouring it into his palm. Ryan bows his head against the headboard edge, still rocking slowly, as Shane’s hand reaches behind him, hiking Ryan upward on his knees and Ryan grips the headboard, shutting his eyes when Shane’s hard fingers trace shapes down toward his crevice, pressure against the indent of his tailbone and a wet glimmering trail down and in. Ryan goes still and holds his breath when Shane’s arm snakes around him, imprisoning him in this stagnant position of bated breath.

He feels the touch of Shane’s lips against his arm, hot breaths as moisture touches Ryan’s rim, more liberally poured lubricant and Shane’s fingertips smoothing in on the most tenuous skin.

“Down,” Shane whispers against him. “Slowly.”

Ryan hears the sound of Steven getting up and the sound of his belt buckle as well as the shift of fabric as he removes his trousers. He gasps, clinging tight and settling on Shane’s wet fingers. His breath shakes out of him between swallows and his legs involuntarily splay outward as his knees cling to Shane. He makes a soft, high sound like, “Ugh,” while Shane starts to finger-fuck him. Shane is hard, tense-- tightly-wound as his erection scrapes lightly over Ryan’s hip—light enough to electrify every single nerve and bring him upward so he can only groan helplessly into Shane’s neck.

When his fingers enter again, Ryan gets lost in the burst of delicious right within him. Shane adds another dollop over the crook of his fingers as he slips in and everything is so slick. Ryan reaches for Shane’s hair, clutching while he rolls back against it, taking both fingers in, panting little unsure breaths. He moans without vocals his encouragement when another set of fingers slip over his back and up his shoulders and the scent of Steven behind him, rockets every sense in him.

Plump, full lips glide over his back as the raw fragrance of sugar and cologne, musky and rich, cloys in and Ryan arches under touches. Steven’s kisses turn to nibbles and Ryan’s already flooded with images and nostalgic sensations from before. He closes his palm again over the head of his cock, rutting upward so Shane slips into his fist and his hungry, hot moan in this cloister of the three of them is perfect. Steven is really there, kissing him as Shane shoves a third finger into him, but he’s so loose it just slides in, pulling him apart.

He feels Steven reach around him, fingers grasping the back of Shane’s neck, pulling him in just as Shane spreads his fingers. Ryan squeezes tighter as he cries from the shock of it. When he turns his cheek against Shane’s chest, he’s greeted with the vision of Steven opening his mouth over Shane’s.

Their kiss is cinematic--at least to Ryan it is. Shane pushes his tongue over Steven’s full lower lip with a new zeal and there’s something surprising in the way Steven holds him in place, tilting his head as if to regulate him. Ryan is alarmed at the effect just the sight of them kissing has on him. Or it could be Shane’s fingers still pushing in and out, knuckles striping along very sensitive skin.

“Oh, _fuck_ me,” he sighs, not daring to squeeze against Shane any further because it’s all pushed him to the very edge already. He rocks a bit helplessly, up into his fist, shaking as the head of his dick bumps up over Shane’s again and hot fingers fill him.

“In a moment,” Steven murmurs against Shane’s lips, pausing for a breath, amusement dripping from his tone and Shane’s smile is euphoric and dazed with bright lust.

“He feels so soft inside,” Shane groans, nuzzling Steven’s cheek. Steven turns his head and pecks at Shane, smiling when Shane’s tongue darts out, flicking over the corner of his mouth.

“I know,” Steven hisses into the dip of Ryan’s shoulder as he kisses him up, along the ripples of his throat, dragging the familiar grooves of his lips along spaces he used to. “I _remember_.”

Something in Ryan floods hot, a different sort of flush.

Steven withdraws, slipping a hand under Ryan’s chin, twisting him a little ways back to kiss him. He seals his lips over Ryan’s, tongue slipping over his teeth, licking right into his mouth and Shane’s hand speeds up and Ryan pants against Steven’s mouth, forgetting rhythms for breathing. Steven’s smooth, thin fingers reach downward and grip Ryan’s ass, forcing him upward so he can’t even rock against Shane’s fingers.

Steven lets go of Ryan’s jaw and seems to busy himself with something behind Ryan and it’s Shane who leans up to kiss Ryan. He can taste traces of Steven’s sugar-laced breaths on Shane’s tongue and he loves that.

There’s the sound of the tube being opened again and Ryan has to balance on Shane’s shoulders, thighs being forced apart as Shane’s knees curve.

“Push, Shane,” Steven orders and Shane’s fingers go deep; deeper than before and Ryan utters a faint cry as the very miniscule tip of Shane’s finger glances against a blind, white place of tickling pleasure.

“Relax.” Shane commands and the word does have power. Ryan goes liquid unable to keep himself together. He writhes when Shane rubs up against his prostate, fingers sliding through the sheets without purchase. Ryan hisses wordless things against Steven’s mouth as they kiss again, breaking away, fully debilitated.

“Christ,” Ryan hisses, unable to help himself. He can’t keep breathing properly and he’s getting dizzy. Steven licks a line along his throat, blowing softly so the plastered strands of his hair feather from his neck.

“Open him,” Steven says and from the sound of lube slick on skin, Steven’s fingers must be perfectly lubed up. Shane draws out, fingers still spread and Ryan winds up writhing forward against Shane just as another finger slips in where Shane’s knuckles are open.

Ryan starts to utter faint curses, breathless and unmoving while Steven goes in with what feels like two fingers of his own and Shane keeps him open. It’s a drown between being split and licked deep inside. His cock twitches against Shane’s stomach when Steven goes upward and curls one finger. He feels so full and he’s practically blind with it as the room goes blurry with pale yellow burning.

“You can take it,” Shane whispers, sending him numb kisses, holding steady as Ryan begins to tremble. “Come on, Ryan.”

Ryan clenches his teeth, utterly delirious with fierce sensations, feeling spread and impaled. “Oh, damn,” he begs. “...Steven…fuck, Shane….” And Shane makes a harsh, growling sound, spading Ryan’s lips apart with his tongue.

Steven’s fingers begin to slide in more insistently, forcing Shane’s fingers to spread wider and the rest of Ryan’s body feels like it’s gone completely numb. Either that or he’s just so hypersensitive that even Steven’s lips on the shell of his ear feels directly connected to his dick.

“S’that good?” Shane breathes against him and Ryan can’t make words for how _very_ good it is in this single maddening second.

“All right,” Steven mutters, tone too raked raw with wrecked anticipation to sound smug. “Shane…”

He lifts Ryan’s hips again with a firm grasp and Shane makes a relieved, wanting noise, slipping his fingers away and gripping with one hand. Ryan sits down on him again when Steven lets him and this time right on Shane’s cock. They both groan and Ryan tosses his head back, feeling like he’s swimming in heat. His head lolls against Steven’s shoulder and he can barely move. Steven grips him harder again and Ryan utters a harsh, high cry as Steven starts to jog him up and down right into the stretch and filling pull of Shane’s cock.

Shane begins rocking his angular hips up, fingers clenching tighter and Ryan feels like he’s going to break and it’s never been this amazing. He gasps empty things, no words but pleas for more with Steven’s mouth feathering on his neck, teeth scraping over a tender vein.

He was expecting it, but sense doesn’t seem to be working too well for Ryan in his current position when Steven holds his hips still, ceasing their delicious rock together. Shane growls and it shakes all three of them. The head of Steven’s cock, touches right where Ryan ends and Shane begins. “Ungh…god,” Ryan mewls, voice practically a squeak when Steven begins to slowly—achingly slow—edge himself in.

He pauses, shuddering breath as he enters and Ryan’s eyes drop shut from sheer blazing ecstasy. The pause feels like a millennium and he doesn’t breathe for it.

Steven pushes in first, deep and Ryan clutches Shane’s shuddering frame, balancing completely upright between the two of them. Shane’s eyes slide shut as he thrusts, legs flexing under Ryan and Ryan reels, exhales like salt air, burning and perfect. It’s slow, and a pattern that has no end. Steven’s fingers dig in at the underside of his ass, controlling the pace.

Ryan’s spine curves and Steven’s in him and the sweet, sweet wet stretch and the twist in of Shane’s cock has them all gasping. Steven is thick enough to press Shane right on the inside, running silk over tenuous skin that has Ryan wanting more already.

There’s no further words and Ryan lays rigid back against Steven’s chest, letting him grip and rock them both. Ryan gasps with each interchange of them, lips pressed to Shane’s throat. Shane grasps at his thigh and his other hand yanks at the sheets when they both start to speed up.

Ryan is steamed with sweat and quivers every time Shane pulls out. Steven grinds in and as Shane follows, they’re sharing brief kisses mixed with nuzzles against Ryan’s skin. Shane croons faintly, frame beginning to stiffen and Ryan is all raw and immolated. He’s too busy trying to remain balanced and not jolt either of them out of place but his whole body is trembling and riddled with shocks.

Then fingers are grazing, knuckles tracing down his stomach and he must’ve started to cry loud peals of euphoria, pleas. Not sure who is doing what that’s sending him to this hysteric branch of perfection. He jerks up against Shane and Steven starts to ride up into him quicker and quicker, harsh breaths clouding his ear. He feels his entire being writhe when it explodes within him from his chest to his stomach and downward and he opens his eyes, mouth open without sound as everything goes completely white. He tightens and both Shane and Steven groan low, different timbres and he grasps at Shane’s nape, barely able to inhale properly when it’s done.

He’s sticky and spent and Shane’s clutch around him gets its tightest and Ryan blurrily gazes at him, eyes empty with lust breaking down under him.

It’s a slick bridge of the both of them still interchangeably rolling their hips in; Steven is now more fluid as he seems to be about to come. Ryan splays back again, sated and panting while Shane curves inward, teeth razing up his shoulder and fucking his rim nearly raw. Steven makes a deep, cadent sound on his deepest thrust and Ryan feels the twitch of it and Shane throws his head back, caught in the tightness and throb of Steven.

“Go on,” Ryan whispers, clenching his teeth.

“Ryan,” Shane growls and Ryan feels Steven’s fingers interlace with Shane’s on his stomach.

“Just a little…more,” Steven mutters on a tail-end of a gasp, rocking in faster without a definable pattern.

Shane comes first and Ryan feels like the whole inside of him just melts with warmth between the two of them clutching him. He’s far gone and exhausted in some half-delirium when Steven clutches him and makes a caustic sound of release and Shane shifts backward slowly, head falling against pillows.

Ryan spreads out on Shane, fully done in and waits, fingers curled as Steven carefully pulls out and Shane lifts Ryan’s thighs in order to slip out. Ryan barely slides off of Shane, hitting the cool sheets to the left of the both of them.

“Think that makes up for lost time?” Steven asks into their resulting breathing silence.

Ryan twitches at a sudden alarming sound realising seconds later that Shane had twisted and blew a raspberry against Steven’s stomach. That shatters what might have been a charged moment. Steven blinks for a second, looking stunned before going completely spread eagle with an exhausted delighted laugh. “You’re both insane,” he says to Shane, who smiles, a really lovely shy smirk that makes whatever’s left on Ryan that can still feel something go quite warm. “No wonder you wanted me.”

Ryan, eyes still shut, turns his head to Steven. “Don’t act like you didn’t fly clear across the country for us,” he snaps, voice hoarse and Shane’s chest rumbles with his laugh.

“How else was I gonna get to keep you both?” Steven laughs, and Ryan feels Shane sigh a long deep content sound, reckless and familiar. He likes the idea of both of them being his, even if it implies that he has some kind of control over the two of them when he’s never had anything close to that.

Ryan presses his forehead against Shane’s side and gives a last heavy exhale. “Whatever, dude.” He can only feel relief. _Confusion_ and relief. On their own they were just too much, love like drowning. Now with another person to temper Ryan might just survive them. Even if he didn’t survive their combined plans to change the world. With his help _they_ might survive it.

He barely registers their low laughter or their different tones. Their soft conversation goes on, Steven’s austere words followed by Shane’s content murmurs as the burn of the lights disappear when Ryan eyes completely close and the bright beautiful world behind his eyelids swallows him.

**Author's Note:**

> I was answering some watcher entertainment related asks and then I got an image and the image wouldn't leave me alone until I got it down. Between the image of Ryan kissing Shane in front of Steven and Steven not giving a fuck and then of course a big ol' kink that I've been dying to write for a long time in this fandom; yeah this needed doing.


End file.
